Chris Hewitt (St. Paul)

(2012-05-01 19:20:23)

In Jonah Hex, Josh Brolin plays a Wild West bounty hunter who can talk to dead people. So how come he couldn't yank the film's director out of his coma?

Devin Faraci

(2012-05-01 15:28:37)

80 some odd minutes of bland, boring, tedious nonsense. Utterly inept and squandering potential at every opportunity, the only 'interesting' thing the film has going for it is an ending that is totally bizarro, terribly conceived and bafflingly stupid.

JoeB131

(2012-05-01 18:07:35)

Kind of a mess, really...

I think somewhere, a Hollywood Producer said, "Hey,we bought this comicbook property, but the hero doesn't have any super powers! What the...""No problem, we'll give him this freakish ability to talk to the dead,and rewrite his origin story to match!" This in not the Jonah Hex ofthe comics, this is kind of a warmed over "Wild, Wild West". Especiallythe part with the superweapon and President Grant. Well, at least itwasn't a giant spider...Brolin is okay as Hex, John Malkovich is okay as Trumbull, but MeganFox... ugh. One can only hope this is a career ender for her. Theaction is fun to watch, kind of predictable...New Rule. Not every comic book character translates well to movies..

Steve Biodrowski

(2012-05-01 02:33:48)

At times it is as if JONAH HEX was shot twice, and the editors could not decide which pieces to use, so they intercut both of them.

Jim Van Meer

(2012-04-29 21:47:25)

Tripe

I don't really know where to start with this one. I came into the movienot expecting much, and that's essentially what I got.It saddens me to see the talents of Josh Brolin and John Malkovich goto waste in a brainless comic book movie. Basically, Josh Brolin playsJonah Hex, who accidentally (I think?) killed Quentin Turnball's(played by John Malkovich) son, and Hex's family is subsequently killedin revenge by Turnball. However, before killing Jonah's family andleaving him to die, Turnball brands him with his initials so that he'dforever know who he wronged, or something.Then the opening exposition claims that Turnball perished in a fire, orsomething, and that's where I found the first major problem with thefilm: the first act is essentially aimless, as Jonah Hex basicallywanders around the Western landscape (and meets up with Megan Fox,since they apparently have an undisclosed past relationship) forreasons I cannot recall.However, and I think before he meets with Megan Fox (who can't carry anaccent to save her life), he goes to a Podunk desert outpost and shootsup the denizens with two horse-mounted, hand-cranked machine guns(which is actually awesome - one of the few good things about themovie). While this is cool, it ultimately foreshadows the true spiritof this film: flashy, but with little substance.It's like having a Fourth of July fireworks show in the dead of winter,and some of the fireworks misfire and burn down the neighborhood.Disastrous, but entertaining (if you have a dark sense of humor), ifyou're at a distance.Okay, maybe that's not a fair assessment of Jonah Hex, since it's avery stupid - but benign - film. Stupid, since the plot, as you mayhave surmised by now, is extremely shoddy and scatterbrained. Theultimate plot of the movie is about Turnball being alive, somehow, andwanting to blow up Washington, DC (more specifically, the CapitolBuilding) for revenge after the Confederates lost the Civil War.Somehow Turnball got a hold of Dragon Balls and the schematics for a19th century Death Star (invented by Eli Whitney, no less), and usesthem from a large series of cannons to eviscerate all that cross hispath - and are within firing range. And Jonah Hex wants to get revengefor Turnball nearly killing him, by killing Turnball.Like I said, Brolin's talents are wasted on this movie, as an okayportrayal of a sullen and deadpan cowboy can't save a movie whosescript was written by a schizophrenic pyromaniac cowboy. The same goeswith Malkovich, who also looks really awkward with a bald spot and longhair.Oh, and Megan Fox. It seems like she really enjoys getting casted inbad movies. If you're 13 and going for the hopes of seeing some of Ms.Fox's skin, I have to say that you'll be disappointed. But I doubtanyone is going to go in hopes of seeing some good acting out of her.Also, I can't recall the order of things in the movie because thesequences were seemingly smashed together without any thought of howthey would flow together as a final product. If this movie were ariver, it'd feature white water rapids, with the occasionally piranhamixed in.So, if this movie is so damn terrible, why the 4 out of 10? Because,all in all, and despite it's gaping flaws, this is at heart a popcornmovie. It's brain dead, but if you like explosions and ridiculousWesterns, you may enjoy Jonah Hex.And, like my title for this review, this movie is tripe: thepresentation is poor, it's lined with crap, and although it may brieflytie you over until your next meal, you'll leave hungry, and trying notto think about what you just consumed.

jeremy-hammond-2

(2012-04-29 04:25:41)

Hopefully the DVD release will satisfy the other 2 points.

I used to read the Jonah Hex series in the early 80's and loved it.When I discovered they were releasing a film version, I was ecstatic.First thing - the character portrayals were excellent. The plot wasdirect and to the point, even if facts were slightly stretched. On theother hand, this IS based on a comic book - so a stretching of factsshould be expected by anybody who goes to see it. I found what therewas of the movie entertaining and well-acted. The only draw-back of themovie was the length. I just really felt there was something missing. Idon't know why it was released as an 80 minute movie. It definitely hadthe potential to be so much more. Maybe if they stretched it out to asolid two hours, I could have given it a full ten. Bottom line: Ienjoyed the movie for what it was.

Steve Persall

(2012-04-29 11:06:31)

Seventy-three minutes, not counting the end credits. It may take longer driving to and from the theater... Normally such brevity is welcome, especially with Westerns since Kevin Costner already thinned our patience, three hours at a time.

(2012-04-29 02:42:35)

What's the HEX?

-The special effects were terrible. In many scenes, I could see they were obviously fake. For examples, the scene where Jonah was shooting 2 machine guns straddled on both sides of his horse. Yeah right!-The plot was thin. The acting was non-emotional even when it was showing a teen being abused by the leader of the bad guys.- Even Megan Fox could not save this movie. It's another nail in the coffin of Western genre. No wonder, the majority of movie-goers do not pay to watch Western films any more.

(2012-04-26 21:22:23)

"Jonah Hex" manages to carve a bit of scar tissue into our hearts to remember him by

Sometimes a little anachronism goes a long way, and especially so in movies. Who doesn't enjoy seeing low-tech versions of vehicles, weapons, or common appliances from modern times appearing within films set in the past? Examples from past films include huge dirigibles, colossal flying platforms, mega frigates, and so on. One weapon that fits this category is the automatic crossbow from "Van Helsing," pretty much the only thing I recall from the movie, probably to my benefit. Big is almost always better, no matter what the proponents of equivalence and social niceties tell you. I'll admit, it was only the Gatling gun-enabled horse from the preview which drew to view this steampunk western."Jonah Hex" is director Jimmy Hayward's ("Horton Hears a Who!") take on the graphic novel series of the same name. Josh Brolin ("No Country for Old Men") plays Hex, a horribly disfigured bounty hunter who lives a life of hollow pleasures. His pointless existence began after learning that the true target of his vengeance, Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich, "Rounders," "Being John Malkovich"), had perished in a hotel fire. Turnbull had earned Jonah's ire after burning Hex's wife and son alive in their home, forcing him to watch, and then branding his face. Turnbull justified these horrific deeds because Jonah, a confederate solider, had betrayed his own regiment, killing Quentin's son Jeb in the course of events. Further complicating these double-sided rationalizations is Jonah's belief that he was serving the cause of good in his betrayal of Jeb and the Confederacy. The movie's plot grinds forward with President Grant learning two things: Turnbull is still alive, and is planning to destroy the Union on the eve of its 100th birthday via the use of a country-killing Device.*possible spoilers below*This movie employs many nifty gimmicks to garner interest, but it'll depend on the viewer's taste how successful they tend to be. For myself, I felt they enhanced the experience to a tolerable and even enjoyable level. Without these little details, the plot, acting, and pace wouldn't be able to sustain the attention of most audience members. For example, Jonah is not only an experienced bounty hunter, he is something of a necromancer, being able to speak with the dead. He can coerce them to reveal the locations of his enemies, as well as other information. Each encounter with the dead was very well scripted and filmed, but the pinnacle was when Hex spoke with Jeb Turnbull, Quentin's son who Jonah himself killed. The moral and philosophical questions raised, as well as the mutual agony felt by Jonah and Jeb by their own equal but opposite set paths, felt quite mature for a film of this genre.Further, the gigantism involving many aspects of the movie--such as massive ironclads and cannon balls--was fun and added to the levity. Several dreamlike sequences, during which Jonah internalizes and interprets his current struggles with Turnbull, deepened the moral struggles of our protagonist. As I've mentioned previously, Gatling guns are always cool, and Jonah dual-wielding them on his horse worked in this film. It worked in a ridiculous way, but then that makes all the difference, now doesn't it?*end possible spoilers*The relative merit of mature moral subject matter aside, this movie has more than a smattering of problems which tarnish Hex's silver spurs. In a couple of scenes detailing Jonah's hunt for Turnbull, it is less than obvious to the audience where he is going, why he is there, and how he came to decide to go there. Another reviewer commented that the movie seems heavily edited--if true, this would partially explain the confusing transitions. This brevity permeates the entire movie, not just Hex's detective work. His romance with Lilah (Megan Fox, "Transformers") feels about as satisfying from a story perspective as the water left in a sieve is as refreshment. Jonah's rescue from certain doom is a trippy mess of confusing symbolism. Too little time is lavished on Burke, (Michael Fassbender, "Inglourious Basterds") a fascinatingly sociopathic character with whom Fassbender steals every scene. Finally, Jonah Hex's final confrontation with Turnbull (as well as his post-win "get the girl" scene) seems a forced and inadequate foregone conclusion. One never got the sense that Jonah, his girl, or his nation were ever in any real danger, no matter how convincing Malkovich's or Fassbender's acting.Having been unfamiliar with "Jonah Hex" prior to seeing this movie, I was able to see and enjoy this movie without preconceptions one way or another. One reviewer stated that Jonah is bereft of mystical powers in the comic series, and this detracted from the experience for him. I can understand how it would, and am a little confused why filmmakers would insert these elements had they not been present before--no one better give my precious Scrooge McDuck comics any magical overtones! However, as a veritable blind man to the mythos of the comics, I enjoyed Jonah Hex for how it was portrayed: A spin on the classic Western movie featuring a haunted protagonist who resembles Eastwood's "Stranger" in more than a few ways. It's not "Tombstone," or "The Wild Bunch," and maybe not even purist "Hex" on the silver screen, but it is good fun for an hour or so. Many good-to-strong performances were enough to make me at least consider watching the sequel, should one be made.

Elliot V. Kotek

(2012-04-26 10:54:47)

At least it's relatively short.

Peter Travers

(2012-04-19 23:48:48)

Director Jimmy Hayward fails to establish a viable reason for this movie to exist.

LoneWolfandRoosterDog

(2012-04-19 15:35:43)

Saw it for free. Still felt cheated...

I am a huge fan of the Jonah Hex comic series. Jonah was originally athinly veiled but better version of Eastwood's Stranger, and despitethe parallels to Josie Wales, pre-dates it by 4 years.I would have felt much more generous to this movie if it was made withanother original character instead of bastardizing and cannibalizingthe original source material. There are indeed characters named Hex,Turnbull, and even Megan Fox's Talullah is likely a nod to a characternamed Talullah Black. But here the similarity ends.Josh Brolin is just okay as Hex. I thought he could have at least dyedhis hair to match the comic. He grumbles most of his dialogue, and thefacial appliance does not help his annunciation. I got the feeling thathe was phoning this one in. Malkovich as Turnbull seems bored and a bitout of place. He's servicably evil, but not very fleshed out. Megan Foxseems too pretty too wooden and too sassy to be authentic. I did likethe 'Snake Man'.I'll not re-hash all the plot holes as many have already done. They arelegion. I will say that this is one of those films where mosteverything is at night, and it makes it really hard to see anything,especially when paired with the spastic action scenes that seem to bedone so fast on purpose so you cant actually see anything.If you find yourself curious about Hex, seek out any of the mini-seriesthat writer Joe R. Lansdale had a hand in. Here's a quote that showshow he saw Hex: "He was a hero to some, a villain to others, andwherever he rode, men spoke his name in whispers."

(2012-04-15 07:29:09)

Only Decent

Jonah Hex seeks vengeance on Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich) for killing his family and scarring his face. He thought he lost the chance when he found out that Quintin died in a fire, but it turns out that Quintin faked his death. Jonah never could take his anger out on Quintin, so now's his chance.Brolin is usually always good, but this movie gives him nothing to do but look angry with one bad one liner after another. While Megan Fox just plays off her looks like she did in Jennifer's Body and most of her lines are vain one-liners about how hot she is. The movie has better actors like Aiden Quinn and Jeffrey Dean Morgan (Supernatural season 1, Watchmen and Losers) in very small roles.But if they had longer appearances and Fox wasn't in the movie at all, I think Jonah Hex would still be bad. Jonah Hex isn't that interesting for instance, mostly do to the fact that you know he'll get revenge on the guy that did him wrong. I've seen plenty of better revenge westerns starring Clint Eastwood for instance, to know Jonah will get his revenge. Even if the film has supernatural aspects, there's nothing that separates it from any other revenge western, other than the fact that most of them are better than this.

(2012-04-14 18:33:59)

I loved it

This review is from: Jonah Hex [Blu-ray] (Blu-ray) A great movie, we love it. I would recommend this to all my friends and family. It's filled with action and suspense. Great price and a great movie.

kevin_crighton

(2012-04-08 22:55:54)

A disjointed mess

Jonah Hex a disfigured bounty hunter, is hired by the US Government totrack down Quentin Turnbull, a former soldier now plotting an attack onthe 4th of July. He was also the man who scarred Hex....Oh dear. Potentially this could have been really good. It has JoshBrolin as Hex, and he plays the part perfectly. And there are someexcellent performers in the cast, such as John Malkovich, MichaelFassbender, Megan Fox, and others. However, this film has majorproblems. The storyline is so disjointed, it's sometimes hard to follow. Thereare scenes that look like they could be very interesting, and are overas soon as they've begun. It looks like the script was made up on thespot, or at the very least, either the producers or studio have hackeda huge chunk of the story out of the finished film. Certainly the filmhas a short running time, which does suggest major editing of the film,but because this makes the story hard to follow, it actually slows thepace of the film down, making it feel a lot longer.The director Jimmy Heyward does stage a couple of action scenes, thataren't bad, but it's not enough to save the film.I'm not sure how this film would have looked without the obvious cutsand perhaps re-writes, and perhaps when released on DVD there might bean extended version or directors cut of the film. But based on thisversion this film has to be put down as a major disappointment.

Tyler Hanley

(2012-04-08 10:25:05)

Compelling plot and character development get lost somewhere between explosion No. 1 and explosion No. 78, but the film certainly satisfies the popcorn quotient for summer cinema.

kimi_layercake

(2012-03-31 13:36:57)

"Explosive Action with a Short Fuse"

"Jonah Hex" is an American post-Civil War antihero Western film basedon the DC Comics character of the same name. It follows the adventureof an U.S. military aka scarred bounty hunter with warrants on his ownhead and an offer he cannot refuse: in exchange for his freedom, hemust stop a terrorist who is ready to unleash Hell on Earth.Cast wise, Average. Josh Brolin is the life line of this movie. Hisportrayal of the disfigured bounty hunter is convincing and apt. JohnMalkovich stars as Captain Turnbull, the man who killed Jonah Hex'sfamily and disfigured Jonah ala the film's antagonist. Megan Fox as agun-wielding prostitute and Jonah Hex's love interest."Jonah Hex" strength lies in its stylized cinematography and awesomeguns/weapons. Rest is brutally absurd and pathetic. Megan Fox needs tolearn that she can't always run around with a pretty face. She needssome acting classes fast enough. Pivotal aspects like characterdevelopment, action sequences, dialogue writing, and screenplay are notpaid adequate attention. The result is a movie whose short running timeis a blessing for viewers, who are spared prolonged absurdity andhapless movie experience.Overall, "Jonah Hex" had the potential for great summer popcorn flickwasted by collective failure. It does have a few decent moments, butoverall, "Jonah Hex" is a big letdown.My Verdict: 5/10

Jordan Hoffman

(2012-03-31 00:26:32)

Jonah Mess

tubetha

(2012-03-22 15:42:46)

Loved it!

Don't know what everybody is complaining about?! This movie was funny,action-packed, great to look at, and the acting was much better thaneverybody says. Josh Brolin was great, Megan Fox was quite good andhello people, it has Malkovich as a bad guy! I am not a snob but wentin with very low expectations because of what I have read about JonahHex and was so absolutely pleasantly surprised! Within the first 3minutes I knew I had NOT made a mistake watching it. I really enjoyedthis movie, possibly as much as Planet Terror or The Missing. I ratedit a 9 out of 10 because the low ratings are totally unfair. Give it achance if you like comic books and/or westerns. A really good story anda fun twist on a western. I hope they make a sequel, so there...

(2012-03-22 04:46:23)

bad

This review is from: Jonah Hex (DVD) I did not care for this movie. It seems more often then not you see the whole movie in the trailer, thats about what happened here. I like both of these actorsnot sure what happened